metao (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} metao) wrote,@ 2009-02-20 12:01:00 |
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For (mainly) Anneke
In the beginning there were humans on Kobol.
Then the humans were all like "fuck working" and created robots.
They worked them too long (and for unreasonable hours) and the robots' programming determined that the most efficient answer was to shut their motherfucking systems down.
(that bit is similar to Terminator and The Matrix)
(these "robots" may or may not have been skinjobs - noone is sure when they were created)
The robots and humans eventually made peace, and as cautious friends, everybody left Kobol. The robots went one way, and the humans, in twelve groups, went another.
There were then two timelines:
On the skinjob world, they were eventually all like "fuck working" and created robots.
(they also knew how to resurrect)
They worked them too long (and for unreasonable hours) and the robots' programming determined that the most efficient answer was to shut their motherfucking systems down.
There was a war, and at some point, only the Final Five escaped.
Nobody knows what happened to the robots' robots.
The Final Five did not have FTL, and moved at subluminal speeds to find the humans.
On the human worlds, they were eventually all like "fuck working" and created Cylons.
They worked them too long (and for unreasonable hours) and the robots' programming determined that the most efficient answer was to shut their motherfucking systems down.
There was a war, and at some point, the Final Five arrived.
Then the timelines merge:
The Final Five offered the Cylons resurrection and skinjobs in return for stopping the war.
They created 8 skinjob models.
Number One grew jealous of Seven, and poisoned his line, essentially killing him.*
Even though the Eight were not worked for too long, One betrayed the FF and reprogrammed them to think they were human. When the FF resurrect, they get their memories back; One's plan was to make them learn about and hate humans.
One reprogrammed the other six to not think about the FF.
One initiated the destruction of the Colonies.
And so, our story begins.
* OR DID HE?
Any questions?
In the beginning there were humans on Kobol.
Then the humans were all like "fuck working" and created robots.
They worked them too long (and for unreasonable hours) and the robots' programming determined that the most efficient answer was to shut their motherfucking systems down.
(that bit is similar to Terminator and The Matrix)
(these "robots" may or may not have been skinjobs - noone is sure when they were created)
The robots and humans eventually made peace, and as cautious friends, everybody left Kobol. The robots went one way, and the humans, in twelve groups, went another.
There were then two timelines:
On the skinjob world, they were eventually all like "fuck working" and created robots.
(they also knew how to resurrect)
They worked them too long (and for unreasonable hours) and the robots' programming determined that the most efficient answer was to shut their motherfucking systems down.
There was a war, and at some point, only the Final Five escaped.
Nobody knows what happened to the robots' robots.
The Final Five did not have FTL, and moved at subluminal speeds to find the humans.
On the human worlds, they were eventually all like "fuck working" and created Cylons.
They worked them too long (and for unreasonable hours) and the robots' programming determined that the most efficient answer was to shut their motherfucking systems down.
There was a war, and at some point, the Final Five arrived.
Then the timelines merge:
The Final Five offered the Cylons resurrection and skinjobs in return for stopping the war.
They created 8 skinjob models.
Number One grew jealous of Seven, and poisoned his line, essentially killing him.*
Even though the Eight were not worked for too long, One betrayed the FF and reprogrammed them to think they were human. When the FF resurrect, they get their memories back; One's plan was to make them learn about and hate humans.
One reprogrammed the other six to not think about the FF.
One initiated the destruction of the Colonies.
And so, our story begins.
* OR DID HE?
Any questions?
